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T~
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
797 posts
Joined: Aug, 2005
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 Posted - 2006/07/14 : 20:31:34
3 dwarfs were outside the guiness book of records building and one says.
"Sod this, i know i have the smallest feet in a the world, i'm going to see if can be famous and in the guiness book of records."
he goes in and comes out 30 mins later with a fat grin on his face and tells everyone how hes now famous.
the second one then claims to have the smallest hands in the world, so like the first, he goes in, comes out, and doesnt shut up about how hes famous.
anyways, the 2 that have been in look at the last one and say, "mate we know why your famous, you and your tiny tim". so the third thinks, **** it, i know i have a small knob... may aswell be famous for it.
so he goes in.
an hour later he comes outa the building looking like hes about to cry..
the other 2 look at him and ask him whats wrong.
he then replies "who the **** is mc storm"
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Uproar
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
1,644 posts
Joined: Aug, 2004
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 Posted - 2006/07/14 : 21:18:31
Brilliant! 
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"The thing I hate about you, Rowntree, is the way you give Coca-Cola to your scum, and your best teddy bear to Oxfam, and expect us to lick your frigid fingers for the rest of your frigid life."
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SeY
New Member
United Kingdom
66 posts
Joined: Oct, 2005
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Posted - 2006/07/15 : 14:16:17
whats the difference between black and white?
you cant wash windows with a shovel...
hahaha!!!
SeY
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FUBAR CREW!!!
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1up
Advanced Member
Australia
1,091 posts
Joined: Jan, 2005
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Posted - 2006/07/15 : 14:32:15
quote:
Originally posted by T~:
3 dwarfs were outside the guiness book of records building and one says.
"Sod this, i know i have the smallest feet in a the world, i'm going to see if can be famous and in the guiness book of records."
he goes in and comes out 30 mins later with a fat grin on his face and tells everyone how hes now famous.
the second one then claims to have the smallest hands in the world, so like the first, he goes in, comes out, and doesnt shut up about how hes famous.
anyways, the 2 that have been in look at the last one and say, "mate we know why your famous, you and your tiny tim". so the third thinks, **** it, i know i have a small knob... may aswell be famous for it.
so he goes in.
an hour later he comes outa the building looking like hes about to cry..
the other 2 look at him and ask him whats wrong.
he then replies "who the **** is mc storm"
haha! good one! mc storm? his not that much of a jerk LOL
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fcuk the rails. fcuk the rails! FCUK THE RAILS!
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Chidda
Average Member
United Kingdom
162 posts
Joined: Feb, 2004
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Posted - 2006/07/15 : 19:23:46
I dont know if this one has alrdy been posted but m8 told it me other day
"Steve Bruce has been in the wrong job for 20 yrs, after he sold a black pudding to wigan for £5.5 million he realised he could have been a butcher!"
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"Shatter the glass and 2nd half on yer funky ass...funky ass...funky ass, funky, funky..ass,ass"
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reenz
Advanced Member
Australia
928 posts
Joined: Sep, 2005
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Posted - 2006/07/16 : 06:41:22
Why do gorillas have big noses?
because they have big fingers
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<---- these boots were made for stompin'
I make whirlpools in my fishtank
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The Doc
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
2,718 posts
Joined: Jan, 2006
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Posted - 2006/07/16 : 22:11:50
How do you know your sisters on a period?
Because your dads dick tastes of blood!
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Rock you in your face! stab your brain with your nose bone!
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Underloop
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
3,895 posts
Joined: Mar, 2002
91 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2006/07/16 : 22:25:50
Careful Paul - thats bordering on Baptist territory!
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"We don't stop playing because we grow old;
we grow old because we stop playing."
- George Bernard Shaw
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1up
Advanced Member
Australia
1,091 posts
Joined: Jan, 2005
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Posted - 2006/07/17 : 08:21:16
quote:
Originally posted by [email protected]:
How do you know your sisters on a period?
Because your dads dick tastes of blood!
now thats just an ugly, rude, incest joke.
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fcuk the rails. fcuk the rails! FCUK THE RAILS!
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kathryn
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
6,520 posts
Joined: Apr, 2005
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Posted - 2006/07/17 : 12:39:19
quote:
Originally posted by 1up:
quote:
Originally posted by [email protected]:
How do you know your sisters on a period?
Because your dads dick tastes of blood!
now thats just an ugly, rude, incest joke.
Thats not funny at all Paul!
Fookin sick if you ask me! 
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:)
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Chris Goldfinger
Senior Member
United Kingdom
311 posts
Joined: May, 2006
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Posted - 2006/07/17 : 12:45:18
^^^^^^^^^^^ i agree that was fookin sick
But funny as feck also!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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jenks
Advanced Member
United Kingdom
3,687 posts
Joined: Feb, 2003
19 hardcore releases
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Posted - 2006/07/17 : 14:47:15
Distasteful jokes are the best jokes:
How many babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends how hard you throw them...
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reenz
Advanced Member
Australia
928 posts
Joined: Sep, 2005
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Posted - 2006/07/17 : 15:18:35
bahahaha
whats the hardest thing about rollerblading?
Telling your parents your gay
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<---- these boots were made for stompin'
I make whirlpools in my fishtank
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jessie
New Member
United Kingdom
39 posts
Joined: May, 2006
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Posted - 2006/07/17 : 15:22:13
ye dont no if youve herd this 1 but hey
a young man was walking across the beach when he hears someone crying. he goes over to take a look n finds a woman sobbing.
he asks whats wrong n she replies,
"i have no arms no legs n ive never had a kiss"
so the man gave the woman a kiss and walked off.
shortly after leaving the woman he hears crying again.
so he walks back over to the woman n says,
"i already gave u a kiss why are u still crying?"
she replies,
"a have no arms no legs n ive never been f*cked"
so the man picks up the woman n throws her into the sea yelling
"YOUR ****ED NOW ARNT YOU!"
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slippery when wet
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dj baptist
Banned
Albania
48 posts
Joined: Jun, 2006
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Posted - 2006/07/17 : 15:53:08
whats black and got 27 tits?
a binbag outside a breast cancer clinic
what kind of file is used to make a 10mm hole
into a 40mm hole?
a peadophile hahaha
safeout peeps
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